Devotion
by Cuthbert72
Summary: A/U. This is a 'what if' story. When Chris dies, it occurs to Cassie that running away would break Sid's heart. She calls him. She needs his consolation and support.
1. Chapter 1: Consolation

**A/N: This is a 'what if' story. What if Cassie, instead of running away to the 'Big Apple', had the inspiration or the presence of mind to call her beloved Sid.**

 **It was originally conceived as a short one-shot, but I now intend to continue towards the funeral.**

 **The dialogue near the beginning and in the eighth chapter is direct from 'Skins' but with a few adaptations..**

 **If the spelling of Indian dishes seems odd, it was taken from the menu of the Shadin Indian restaurant in Staple Hill, Bristol, which is the nearest one to Chris's flat.**

 **Chapter 1: Consolation**

The evening of the day after a rather awkward 'dinner party', Chris and Cassie were relaxing. They had spent the day together watching some television and generally chatting about things in general. Chris didn't feel well enough to go out, so Cassie was looking after him. She had gone to some trouble in the morning, boosting his morale and telling him he wasn't worthless. She suddenly remembered the tee shirt she had obtained on the way back from her exam the previous day.

"Oh! Forgot," said Cassie, "I got something for you."

"Yeah?" said Chris.

"Stole it on Park Street." said Cassie.

Cassie went into her bedroom.

"Smart." said Chris, "You were gonna tell me who you were talking to outside."

Chris looked round,wondering where Cassie had gone. She emerged from her bedroom, holding a blue 'Monkey Man' tee shirt.

"Cass?" said Chris, "Oh, cool! Oh, man! Fucking A, man!"

Chris put the tee shirt on.

"Chris," said Cassie, "I've been thinking about secrets."

"Here comes the Monkey Man!" interjected Chris, dancing.

"Sometimes you have to keep them." continued Cassie, "In case someone got hurt."

"Oh, I can't wait to show this to, um Show it to, um Cass?" said Chris, doubtfully, "Show it to, um My girlfriend, what's her name?"

"Don't be stupid!" said Cassie, baffled.

It was suddenly obvious that Chris was not feeling well.

"Spliff," gasped Chris "I - I feel a bit Shit."

Chris got up from the chair and staggered into his bedroom. He collapsed onto the bed, clutching his head and started shaking. It appeared as if he as having a fit.

"Chris? Chris, you OK?" said Cassie, panicking and calling an ambulance, "Come on! Fuck! Come on! Help! Please help. He needs help! Number 4 Lewis Gate Flats!"

"They're coming, Chris!" continued Cassie.

Cassie tenderly cradled Chris in her arms.

"Got it; Jal. Got it," whispered Chris, "That's her name."

With this, he breathed his last and became a deadweight in Cassie's arms. She held him gently until the paramedics arrived, checked him out and took him away.

To say that Cassie was distraught would be an understatement. Her best friend after Sid had died in her arms and there was nothing she could have done about it. This outcome was not entirely unexpected, but it still came as a shock. Now that the flat was otherwise empty, Cassie had time to think. Her first instinct was to run away, as far as possible, from this horrible place. She did start getting things together and putting them into her rucksack. She felt as if her world was collapsing around her.

"Oh my sweet Lord Jesus," said Cassie, in desperation and almost in tears, "Please, please help me!"

Gradually, she came to realise that there was someone whose heart would be totally shattered if she just disappeared. She paused. She also came to realise that Sid was not the only person who would be hurt by her absence. Since her reconciliation with Sid, she had formed friendships with several of the 'gang', particularly Jal. However it could well be some time before she would be able to see Michelle as a friend again.

She picked up her mobile phone from her bed where she had thrown it down in her panic after calling the ambulance. She looked at it for a bit. She called Sid. By this time, her emotions were getting the better of her and her eyes were filling up with tears.

He answered.

"Oh, Sid!" sobbed Cassie, "Something dreadful's just happened. I don't know what to do."

Sid realised that something was genuinely wrong from the tone of Cassie's voice.

"Oh, sweet Cass," said Sid, sounding concerned, "What's wrong?"

"It's Chris." said Cassie, "He's dead. He died while I was holding him. I'm so scared. Please come!"

"Of course I'll come." said Sid, "Just stay there, I'll be about ten minutes."

Sid took the red mini and drove to Chris's flat. He flicked the letterbox and waited. Getting no immediate answer, he was worried. He flicked the letterbox again as there was no doorbell. The inside light came on. Cassie opened the door. It was obvious from the look of her that she had been crying. As soon as she recognised Sid, she embraced him and sobbed convulsively. He gently closed the door and led the weeping Cassie to the sofa. There, he held her gently until her sobs started to subside.

"Oh, sweet Sid," sobbed Cassie, "I'm so frightened, He – he just went a bit vague and then collapsed. One minute, he was alive, talking and joking. The next, he was dead. I was holding him. I felt his life just draining away. It was horrible. I don't know what to do. Oh Sid, please, please help me."

The words just came tumbling out. Then Cassie burst into tears again. Sid gently held her, tenderly and sympathetically caressing her shoulders.

"Oh, my sweet Cassie." said Sid, "Words can wait. You just need to cry. I'll stay with you as long as it takes."

"You – you really mean that?" said Cassie, hesitantly.

"Of course!" said Sid, "I love you. I care about you. You're special, very special."

"You're not going to suddenly die on me are you?" asked Cassie.

"Not if I have anything to do about it," said Sid, "I'm afraid you're stuck with me."

This comment produced a weak smile from Cassie. She found this slightly reassuring. Sid's sweet reassurances and his gentle caresses were gradually calming Cassie. This was another side to Sid that Cassie had not seen. She respected and loved him even more after this. After about an hour of this, Cassie had calmed down enough to speak coherently.

"Where do we go from here, Sid?" asked Cassie, her voice still a little tremulous.

"Not very far tonight." said Sid, "But tomorrow, I'm afraid we've got some boring formalities to deal with."

"Will you stay with me?" pleaded Cassie, "I don't want to be alone tonight."

"OK." said Sid, "I'll have to contact the dairy."

"What for?" asked Cassie.

"To let them know I won't be coming in tomorrow." said Sid, "I'll also call mum as I'm staying here."

"How much does she know?" asked Cassie.

"She knows Chris died in your arms." said Sid, "So she won't be surprised that I'm staying with you overnight. She does know how much you mean to me."

"Do you know how much I mean to you?" asked Cassie.

"Of course, my sweet one." said Sid, "I know I've been a bit of a klutz in the past, trying to ignore my feelings, but I know how I feel now. I totally love you and really care about you."

"Thank you." said Cassie, "I knew how much you loved me before you did."

Sid continued his reassuring treatment of Cassie until he felt she was completely calm and then called both the dairy and his mum. The couple now felt they had a basis of trust which could not be undermined.

"How are you feeling now?" asked Sid.

"A lot better." said Cassie, "Strangely, I'm feeling really hungry."

"OK!" said Sid, "What do you fancy. I feel like a curry."

"That's alright with me," said Cassie, "I quite like Indian food these days."

"That's good." said Sid, "I'd better deal with Chris's bed first. I appreciate you're not ready to do that just yet.

"Are you sure?" asked Cassie, "That's so sweet of you."

"Stay there." said Sid. "I won't be long."

"I'll repair my make-up and put something on while you're doing that." said Cassie.

All she was wearing was a bra, panties and a petticoat.

Sid cleared the vomit from the duvet cover and put it in a plastic bag, which he put in a waste bin, washed his hands and took the cover off the duvet. He put it in the washing machine and started it. Meanwhile, Cassie had repaired her make-up and put on her striped grey knitted dress.

"Would you like a take-away," said Sid, "Or shall we eat in the restaurant?"

"Since we're walking there together," said Cassie, "we might as well eat there. I'll try not to cry."

"How likely is that?" asked Sid.

"I think I'll feel better if I get some fresh air, so let's go." said Cassie.

Sid and Cassie set out to walk the short distance to the local Indian restaurant. Cassie admitted that she did feel less miserable once she was outside the flat. Sid was happy to see her beginning to smile again. They turned left onto the main road, crossed it and reached the restaurant. They were shown to a table and given menus.

"I know you normally go for something really hot." said Cassie, "What are you having tonight? I'm having chicken Malaya."

"I'm thinking about something milder, but more interesting." said Sid, "I know. I'll have lamb dansak. Shall we share a side dish?"

"This place does have Bombay aloo on the menu." said Cassie, "We'll share a portion of that. Shall we have rice or flatbreads?"

"You've been here before." said Sid, "You seem to know your way round the menu."

"Yes, Jal used to bring me here when she had cravings for curry in pregnancy." said Cassie. "I got to really like the taste."

"That's wonderful!" said Sid, "We've got a shared taste in food. Anyway, we'll have keema pulao rice if that's alright with you."

"That's perfect." said Cassie, "We'll have a few poppodoms as well."

The couple ordered their meal and waited. It was clear to Sid that Cassie was feeling at least relaxed in this environment, if not actually cheerful. The poppodoms arrived.

"I'm glad I'm able to bring you here." said Sid, "I find a curry makes me feel more relaxed when things are going wrong. Anyway, Cass, what would you have done if I hadn't come?"

"I'm not sure," said Cassie, "I think I would have run away."

"Where would you have gone?" asked Sid, more to make conversation than to get an answer.

"I think I might have gone to America," said Cassie, "And got myself lost in New York."

"But that's so far away." said Sid, "And, from what I've heard, New York is a dangerous place for a young girl on her own. What stopped you?"

"I suddenly thought about you." said Cassie, "I realised how you'd feel if I had just disappeared without a trace."

"Thank you so much." said Sid, "I'm so glad you didn't go."

At this point the waiter appeared with a platewarmer. Shortly afterwards their food arrived. Once they had taken the rice, they shared the other two main dishes and the sag aloo. Conversation stopped as they appreciated their food. Sid tried some of the chicken Malaya and was fascinated by the combination of sweet and spicy flavours. Cassie also appreciated the rich flavours of Sid's lamb dansak. Sid was pleased that Cassie seemed to be really enjoying her food.

"I feel contented in a strange way." said Sid, as he finished.

"So do I!" said Cassie, "Thank you for everything, sweet Sid."

"I'm so pleased that you really enjoyed that." said Sid.

"I don't know why," said Cassie, "But I was so hungry this evening, despite everything that's happened."

"Well," said Sid, "You didn't eat much last night, and I don't think you've had much since."

"I feel satisfied as well." said Cassie, "Thank you again. Lovely as it is here, I suppose we've got to go back to the flat."

Sid paid the bill and the couple made their way back to Chris's flat. As they walked through the covered passage from the road, they enjoyed a rather spicy kiss. Before going to bed, they had a soothing hot chocolate nightcap.

"How are you feeling?" asked Sid.

"Despite what's happened," said Cassie, "I feel contented and calm, but a little sad. You've got a way of taking me out of myself. You're so wonderful."

"Thank you!" said Sid, "When you called me, I wasn't sure if I could help you. I'm so glad I have."

"So am I." said Cassie as she leaned across and embraced Sid, "It's late. Let's go to bed."

On this occasion, Sid and Cassie did not make love. Cassie was just too emotionally exhausted to enjoy sex. She was happy just to lay naked in Sid's warm, loving arms. Just before she succumbed to sleep, she whispered "I love you, Sid. Thank you."

"I know." replied Sid, sleepily.

Despite Cassie's emotional roller coaster of a day, she slept peacefully in Sid's gentle arms. Sid also slept well as he knew that he had calmed her emotions, made her feel as good as she could under the circumstances and saved her from the uncertainty of running away.


	2. Chapter 2: The Morning After

**A/N A short chapter this time. I was going to put the whole day into one chapter, but it proved to be a bit long, so I split it into three.**

 **Chapter 2: The Morning After**

The next morning, Sid awoke first. The sight that greeted him when his eyes opened filled him with love. Cassie sleeping was just about the most beautiful and tranquil sight he would ever see. His first thought was to wake her with a tender kiss. Then he remembered why he was with her and let her sleep a little longer. After all, she had experienced one of the worst emotional traumas it is possible to undergo. The previous day, her best friend, Chris had suffered a fatal subarachnoid haemorrhage. He died in her gentle arms. Sid knew that today was going to be difficult for her. It was likely that it would be spent dealing with formalities concerning the death of Chris and breaking the sad news to friends and Chris's only known relative, his irascible estranged father.

He took the duvet cover out of the washing machine, transferred it to the tumble dryer and started it. He showered and dressed. Returning to the bedroom, he found Cassie still peacefully sleeping. It almost seemed cruel to bring her back to the reality of life, but he knew he had to. He sat on the side of the bed and watched the gentle rise and fall of her chest as she breathed quietly. He felt that, despite what had happened, she had an inner tranquillity that filled him with admiration. However, it was necessary to break the spell and wake her. He gently kissed her hand. She slowly opened her eyes, Their beauty gave Sid another surge of deep love for her.

"Good morning, sweetness." said Sid, "Do you want any breakfast today?"

"Yes," yawned a still sleepy Cassie, "But not too much after that Indian dinner last night. You're up early. I suppose I'd better face the day."

"Are you sure you're ready?" asked Sid.

"I think so." said Cassie, "I feel really calm now you're with me. Thank you so much for coming round last night. I so love you."

"There's no need to thank me." said Sid, "You needed me to be with you to calm you down and comfort you. Anyway, you said you wanted a light breakfast. Buttered toast and muesli OK?"

"That would be perfect." said Cassie, still lying down, "Could I have some Coffee, please?"

"OK!" said Sid, "Would you like it in bed?"

"What's the time?" asked Cassie.

"About half past eight." said Sid.

"I suppose I'd better get up." said Cassie, stretching herself under the bedclothes, "I'll shower while you get it ready."

With this, she swung her legs over the side of the bed, sat up, still naked and got out of the bed. She stretched herself to her full height. Sid gasped and smiled as she stood up. She embraced and kissed him,

"You're so beautiful." said Sid.

"You still think I'm beautiful in the morning?" said Cassie, smiling.

"Of course!" said Sid, "You're always beautiful."

"You're so lovely," said Cassie as she made her way to the bathroom.

Sid smiled as he watched her. He was pleased that she seemed quite cheerful, but was worried that she was putting on an act and would suddenly break down at some time. Sid prepared the breakfast, two bowls of muesli, a jug of milk, a number of slices of toast, the butter dish and a full cafétiere. He had just finished setting the table when Cassie emerged from the bathroom wrapped in a towel and went into the bedroom. She emerged a couple of minutes later in bra, panties and a short petticoat. She sat down and started eating.

"Good morning again." said Sid, "How are you feeling?"

"Calm, peaceful and just a little sad." said Cassie, "I'm not about to collapse in a pool of tears if that's what you're worried about."

"That's good," said Sid, "Because we've got to do some serious things today."

"Such as?" asked Cassie.

"We'll have to go to the hospital and get a medical death certificate that we can take to the registrar," said Sid, "Then, once poor Chris's death has been registered, we have to find his parents. Do you happen to know where to find them?"

"No," said Cassie, "His mother has disappeared, but Jal knows where his father lives."

"That's useful," said Sid, "But I'm not looking forward to breaking the news to her."

"She's coming here at about ten o'clock." said Cassie, "She was going to spend the day with Chris. It's good that both of us will be here when she comes. Incidentally, how did you know what to do when somebody dies?"

"I had to go through all this with my mum when dad died." said Sid, "It did at least keep me from brooding over losing you. Anyway, you're here now and you're eating."

Sid and Cassie finished their breakfast. Sid was pleased that Cassie appeared to enjoy her muesli and ate three slices of buttered toast. The next thing they did was to discuss how they would break the news to Jal.

"I think it's better if I tell her." said Cassie, "I am still her best friend. She'll be upset, but I think she'll take it better coming from me. You can hold my hand. Then, if Jal is up to it, all three of us can do the rounds of the hospital and the Registry Office."

"That's a good idea." said Sid, "I'd better call mum and tell her I'm going to be with you for most of the day."

Sid called his mum. Liz answered.

"Hello Sid," said Liz, "How's Cassie?"

"She's surprisingly calm this morning." said Sid, "I think a peaceful night's sleep was good for her."

"That's good." said Liz, "Tell her she's welcome to come and stay here if she wants to get away from there."

"That's one of the things I'm calling about." said Sid, "I don't think she'll want to be alone anytime soon. Could she spend tonight at our place? I'll be going on my milk round, and it's best if she's not in an empty home when she wakes up."

"Of course! I fully understand." said Liz, "You can tell her she's welcome here at any time. What was the other thing you were going to tell me."

"We will be spending most of today sorting out the formalities." said Sid, "Jal is due here any minute. I'm not looking forward to meeting with her."

"That's understandable." said Liz, "She'll probably cry, so just make her feel she's not alone."

"Cassie has offered to tell her what's happened." said Sid, "She'll be gentler than me, but I'll support her."

"That's a good idea." said Liz, "I think you two should be able to handle it."

"Thanks mum." said Sid, "Of course, once Jal has recovered a bit and we've sorted out the formalities, we've got to go and see Mr Miles."

"That's going to be a challenge." said Liz, "I wish you luck."

"Thanks, mum." said Sid, "We'll see you later. Bye!"

"I'll be expecting both of you this evening." said Liz, "Bye!"

"What was that about?" asked Cassie.

"Mum's quite happy for you to stay with us tonight." said Sid, "So you won't be alone."

"Thank you so much," said Cassie, "But how does your mum feel about me?"

"Don't worry about that." said Sid, "She totally adores you. She knows how special you are to me."

Sid did the washing up after breakfast as there wasn't very much of it. Cassie went back to her bedroom and came out clad in a black calf length dress with cap sleeves.

"Wow!" said Sid, "You've got the knack of dressing appropriately and still looking good."

"I've had this one for ages," said Cassie, "But I haven't had a reason to wear it."

"What about that prom concert about three weeks ago?" said Sid.

"I suppose so," said Cassie, "But you loved my backless gold dress."

"Suppose." said Sid.

The couple sat on the sofa and waited for Jal. Neither of them was looking forward to the encounter. While they were waiting, Sid used his mobile phone to ascertain the location of the registrar. Sid held Cassie's hand to reassure her. It was nearly ten o'clock. They didn't have to wait long. Jal's key turned in the lock. The door opened.


	3. Chapter 3: Jal

**Chapter 3: Jal**

When she entered the flat, Jal was greeted by the sight of Sid and Cassie, sitting next to each other, both dressed in black, looking serious and holding hands. It was obvious from Jal's expression when she saw them that she realised that something terrible had happened.

"It's happened hasn't it." said Jal, sounding slightly shocked.

"I'm sorry," said Cassie, quietly, getting up and walking over to Jal, "Yes, it has."

The two girls embraced. Jal couldn't hold it in any longer and started crying. Cassie held her gently, led her to the sofa, which Sid had vacated. They sat down and Cassie held Jal in much the same way Sid had held her the previous evening. She allowed Jal to cry freely until her immediate grief was exhausted and she was able to speak.

"I suppose it wasn't unexpected." said Jal, with some resignation, "But it was still a shock."

She paused for a while.

"I guess I've known about it since Chris left his home last year," continued Jal, "He had told me about it, but I put it to the back of my mind. I suppose I was in denial, hoping it might not happen. He told me about his brother and said he could suffer from the same condition."

While Cassie was gently consoling Jal, Sid put the kettle on, located the teapot and made some tea. He found three cups, put everything onto a tray with some biscuits and placed it on the coffee table. By this time, Jal had recovered somewhat from her initial shock and was able to help Sid and Cassie with what they had to do next.

"How are you feeling, Jal?" asked Sid.

"A bit better, now the initial shock has worn off." said Jal. "What have you done so far?"

"Only called the ambulance yesterday evening." said Cassie, "The paramedics took him to Frenchay Hospital. Then I called Sid. He came to me straight away, thank God. He calmed me down, consoled me and let me sleep."

"That's good," said Jal, "You must have been quite upset. Sid is a wonderful person. He'll stick by you whatever."

Sid blushed. He wasn't used to getting so much praise from Jal.

"I'm just beginning to realise that." said Cassie, "He's told me that there are some boring formalities to go through today and he will help me to stay as cheerful as I can. At least I think that's what he meant."

"Yes," said Jal, "Sid's probably the best person to help you through this. After all, he had to help his mother when his dad died. Are you OK about what to do, Sid?"

"More or less." said Sid, "We went through it just after breakfast, before I called my mum."

"That's good," said Jal, "Would you like me to come along?"

"Of course," said Sid, "The last thing you want this morning is to be alone. You'd spend the whole day brooding and feeling miserable."

"Thank you." said Jal, "You'll need me in any case when it's time to break the news to Chris's dad, Graham. He's quite a difficult person. I have met him."

"We will." said Cassie, "You're the only one of us who knows where he lives. Anyway, I suppose we should be getting along to the hospital."

"Are you ready for that?" asked Sid.

"We're as ready as we'll ever be." said Jal.

"By the way," said Sid, "I think we'll need his birth certificate. Cass, do you know where he kept it? He would have needed it to get his passport for last year's Russia trip."

"It should be in the bedside cabinet." said Cassie, getting up and heading for Chris's bedroom.

She emerged a couple of minutes later with a large envelope and started sorting through the contents.

"Ah, here it is." said Cassie, "It was with his passport. There are a few other bits and pieces in here which may be useful. We'll take the whole thing."

"That's a good idea." said Sid, "I'll phone them to see if they can fit us in."

Sid called the South Gloucestershire registry office and managed to get an appointment for the middle of the afternoon. He also ascertained that someone who witnessed the death would have to make the application and informed Cassie.

"I was the only person who saw him die." said Cassie, her voice cracking.

Cassie wiped away a tear. Sid wrapped his arms around her to console her.

"I suppose I'll have to identify myself." said Cassie, recovering her composure, "I'll get my passport.

Cassie went to her rucksack and retrieved the passport. Jal raised her eyebrows.

"Where were you thinking of going?" asked Jal.

"My first thought was to run away to New York," said Cassie, "But then I thought of Sid and called him. Thank God, he came straight away."

"That's because he totally loves you." said Jal, "You two have got something really special going. Keep it alive."

Sid blushed again, and then got up to turn off the tumble dryer.

Once they were ready, the three set out for Frenchay Hospital and, after some discussion, obtained the medical death certificate and were given the full address of the South Gloucestershire registrar. By this time, it was getting quite close to lunchtime. Sid was beginning to feel hungry. They got back into the car and discussed what they were going to do next.

"I don't know about you two, but I'm beginning to feel a bit peckish." said Sid.

"I'd like something to eat." said Jal, "I haven't had any breakfast. How about you, Cassie?"

"I'm OK at the moment," said Cassie, "But I'll fit in with whatever you two decide."

"You two girls do seem to be holding up very well." commented Sid.

"That's thanks to you, Sid," said Cassie, "I'm coming to accept that he's gone. Of course I feel sad, but you were wonderful last night. You knew how I felt and you seemed to be able to absorb all my sorrow. Then I felt able to do the same for Jal."

"Yes," said Jal, "Thank you Sid, and thank you Cassie. I'm glad you were both here when I came; and Sid, I've seen a totally different side to you this morning. You're helpful, self-confident and seem to know what you're doing. You seem to thrive away from Tony."

Sid blushed again.

"You can put that down to my sweet Cassie." said Sid, "She makes me believe I'm not worthless. I love her so much. Anyway, where shall we go for lunch?"

It was Cassie's turn to blush.

"We have to go to Kingswood to register." said Jal, "We should find somewhere there. Then we have to face Graham Miles. That won't be easy."

"What's he like?" asked Cassie.

"I suppose he's a typical 'British' man." said Jal, "Very buttoned up. The only emotions he allows himself to express seem to be aggression hate and anger. He's got no time for Chris, or teenagers in general, but we do have to face him because he's his only relative. He's met me, but he'll wonder who you two are."

"Are we ready?" asked Sid.

"Yes." said Jal, "Let's go."

With this, the three set out for the Kingswood district of Bristol. Having found somewhere to park, they walked onto the main Street and looked for somewhere to eat.

"There did seem to be a few places on the main drag." said Sid, "I rather liked the look of the 'Kingswood Colliers' pub. It's half past twelve, so we've missed breakfast. Still, there's plenty more on the menu."

"That's a good idea." said Jal.

"Do they do snacks?" asked Cassie.

The trio walked round to the pub, arrived there at about twenty to one and studied the menu. Sid, of course, had a large mixed grill. Jal chose a normal mixed grill with onion rings. Cassie, after a while, chose a baked potato with coleslaw. They all had coffee as they would need to have their wits about them when they called on Graham Miles. Once they had finished their food, there was still some time before their appointment at the registry office.

"The visit to the registry office should be straightforward." said Jal, "But we'll have to think seriously about how we're going to deal with Mr. Miles. I'll make the first contact and we'll play it by ear from there."

"How do you think he'll react when you tell him the news?" asked Cassie.

"I don't know." said Jal, "But he has already lost his other son to the same condition, so he might be a little more accommodating. Anyway, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

Sid went up to the counter and refilled the filter coffees.

"You didn't pay anything." observed Cassie.

"Refills are free until two." said Sid, "It's ten to, so I thought I'd get the refills in before then."

"I know what we should do, Jal." said Cassie, "You introduce us after making initial contact. I was his flatmate. You were his girlfriend and I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for Sid."

"Where would you have been?" asked Sid.

"Probably at Heathrow Airport waiting for a plane to New York." said Cassie.

"Perhaps we could both go there for a holiday when all this settles down." said Sid.

"That would be so lovely." said Cassie, with the beginnings of a smile, "Anyway Jal, what do you think?"

"I think we're on the same wavelength." said Jal, "Fortunately, I usually dress in dark colours, and you two are wearing black, so he may even guess why we've come to see him, even before anybody says anything."

"That would be good." said Sid, "If that happened, he might be more approachable. After all, you realised what had happened as soon as you walked in."

Sid, Cassie and Jal spent the next half hour discussing their approach to Mr Miles. They had already agreed that they were suitably dressed. At about half past two, they walked down to the council offices to see the registrar. On the way there they spent a few minutes in the park getting into a relaxed frame of mind. The trio entered the registry office with some trepidation as they were quite young and inexperienced in such matters. Cassie did have to produce her passport as she was the person registering the death. As she had no utility bills, so she produced her voter's card from the recent elections. This satisfied the registrar. She also took up the offer of extra copies of the certificate as Graham Miles would have to send certificates to more than one authority as well as an undertaker. Once formalities had been completed, the trio walked back to the car. Jal sat in the front seat as she would have to guide Sid to Graham Miles's house. At about half past four, they were parked at their destination. Jal went up to the front door and rang the doorbell. They waited.


	4. Chapter 4:Taming the Dragon

**Chapter 4: Taming the Dragon**

Sid, Cassie and Jal had arrived at Chris's father's house. Jal had rung the doorbell. After about half a minute, the door opened and Chris's stepmother, Mary appeared.

"Oh, hello," said Mary "You three are looking very serious." she paused, "Something's happened to Chris, hasn't it."

"I'm sorry, but yes it has." said Jal, looking solemn. "I'm sorry to have to tell you, he died early yesterday evening."

"That's so sad," said Mary, "You must be so upset. I'd better get Graham. Come in! Don't want to keep you on the doorstep."

Jal, Sid and Cassie were ushered into the front room. Mary went up to the study to call Graham Miles, Chris's father. After a couple of minutes, which seemed like an eternity, Mr Miles appeared. Mary had already told him the news.

"What happened?" demanded Graham, "I assume he overdosed on those drugs he takes."

"No he didn't." said Cassie with a firmness she didn't realise she possessed, "He had a fatal subarachnoid haemorrhage. I was with him when he died. It was horrible."

Cassie's voice was cracking and tailed off as she said this. She started crying. Sid comforted her.

"He did go into hospital about three weeks ago, but discharged himself." said Jal, "We all told him he should have stayed, but he wouldn't listen."

"That sounds just like Chris." said Graham, "He never did listen to advice."

Looking for another target, he turned on Cassie.

"Anyway, who the bloody hell are you?" continued Graham.

"I'm Cassie. I was his flatmate and he was a very dear friend." said Cassie, resolutely, despite her tears, "For the last two weeks or so, I have been his carer, and this is my boyfriend, Sid."

Cassie started crying again and was relieved that Sid was able to calm her yet again.

"And what have you three been doing all day?" asked Graham, aggressively, "Just hanging around and drinking I suppose."

Jal was beginning to lose patience.

"As a matter of fact," said Jal, standing up and becoming just a bit irritated, "We have been saving you the inconvenience of registering your own son's, and my boyfriend's, death. Cassie was with him when he died, so she was qualified to register his death. She was cradling him in her gentle arms when he breathed his last. Can you imagine the emotional pain of having a very close friend die in your arms? Anyway, we've also obtained, at our own expense, two additional copies of the death certificate as we appreciate you will need them to notify other authorities. Chris was a good friend to all of us, and we cared about him. I was his girlfriend. Cassie shared his flat and looked after him when he became ill. Sid, Cassie's boyfriend helped when he could. It may be news to you, but Chris was in a steady job for the last eight months of his short life. We've come here this afternoon to inform you about Chris's death and to give you the documents you will need to engage an undertaker. I guess you do, at least, want to give your son a decent funeral."

Jal sat down and placed the envelope containing the certificates on the coffee table in front of the sofa. Graham Miles looked deflated. He had been quite taken aback by Jal's confident statement. He sat down and paused to gather his thoughts for a while before replying.

"I'm - I'm almost lost for words." said Graham, "When Mary told me that you were here and why, I was preparing to give you a piece of my mind about irresponsible teenagers. It seems I've totally misjudged you. What I see in front of me is a trio of serious minded responsible young adults who have saved me a lot of hassle by acting correctly and doing all the right things. I apologise for my misguided assumptions about you. You are three young people, who actually cared about my son, were loyal and were with him when he needed someone. I almost feel ashamed of the way that I abandoned him when he needed a father."

"Thank you." said Jal, "You have a right to your opinion, but I think you'll find that we're not a collection of drug crazed yobs. We're just normal young people with our own feelings, frustrations and dreams just trying to get on with our lives."

"When did I call you 'drug crazed yobs'?" asked Graham.

"When I came here last year with Chris because he was homeless." said Jal.

"Point taken!" said Graham, "You've got a good memory. Incidentally, how did you three get to know what to do when Chris died?"

"My dad died early this year." said Sid, "I had to help mum with all the formalities. We had to go to a different registry office this time because Chris died outside the Bristol city area."

"You're quite a team." said Graham, "One of you was with him when he died. Another knew what to do and the third knew where I live. I can only apologise again for my preconceptions about the company Chris kept."

"If you got to know us," said Jal, "I think you would find that all of our little group of friends are good people. Apart from coping with Chris's death, our main concern at the moment is our exam results, expected in about two weeks."

"I suppose what you have told me wasn't unexpected." said Graham, quietly, "His brother, Peter died of the same condition when he was still a young boy. After I left my first wife, I was minded to exclude Chris's group of friends from the funeral when it happened. However, from what I've seen of you this afternoon, it's plain you played a major part in his life. It would be unfair to prevent you from saying 'goodbye'. I'll let you know when and where when I have sorted things out with the undertaker."

"Thank you so much." said Jal, "We'll leave you now. I think Sid and Cassie need to express their grief in private; for that matter, so do I."

"I understand," said Graham, "I'm sorry I Was so short with you just now, Cassie. You must have been traumatised by Chris's death. I didn't mean to make things worse. I sense you're a sweet, gentle, compassionate person and I attacked you without reason. As I said, I'm really sorry. It's just my rather brusque nature. I tend to jump to conclusions without thinking."

"Oh, that's alright, Mr Miles." said Cassie, "You weren't to know who I was. If It's any consolation to you, I don't think he suffered much when he passed away."

Cassie once again broke down in tears as the image of Chris's last seconds came back into her mind. Sid once again comforted her. With this, the three friends took their leave of Mr Miles and, after exchanging contact details, returned to Chris's flat. Sid drove, while Jal consoled Cassie in the back seat. When they arrived, Jal led a still gently weeping Cassie into the flat and sat her on the sofa. Sid sat next to her and continued his efforts of consolation. Jal put the kettle on, extracted the duvet cover from the tumble dryer and got out the ironing board.

"You needn't do that." said Sid.

"Cassie needs you right now," said Jal, "And this gives me something to do while I'm waiting for the kettle."

By the time Jal had made the tea and found some cakes, Sid had succeeded in calming Cassie down and restored the beginnings of a faint smile to her sweet face.

"I'm sorry that you had to go through that, Cassie," said Jal, "But we did have to go and see him."

"I understand." said Cassie, "I needed to tell him that Chris didn't die in agony. Oh, incidentally, his last word was 'Jal'."

"Thank you." said Jal, suddenly sounding tearful, "That was so sweet. He loved me to the end."

Jal cried, but recovered fairly quickly.

"Sorry about that." said Jal, "I'm normally more in control."

"Both of you were good in there." said Sid, "I think we've given Mr Miles something to think about."

"We have." said Jal, recovering, "He'll invite us to the funeral, but Chris had four more friends who would want to give him a send off."

"I suppose you mean Tony, Michelle, Maxxie and Anwar." said Sid.

"In a word, yes." said Jal, "I suppose we'll have to break the news to them sometime."

"We could text them tonight." said Sid.

"That would be cruel and impersonal." observed Cassie, "We need to tell them face to face."

"We do." said Jal, "We'll do it tomorrow. If I tell Michelle, she will spread the news, then I expect Tony will want us all to get together later on."

"That's a good idea." said Sid, "I'll leave that to you. Call me when you've told Michelle."

"I suppose, now Chris is no more, I'll have to move out of here." said Cassie, with a tinge of sadness in her voice, "Where am I going to live?"

"Oh, sweet Cassie," said Sid, "Don't fret about that. I'm sure mum will let you stay with us. Anyway, Jal, I'm looking after Cassie at my place tonight. Do you want a lift home?"

"OK. Thank you." said Jal, "Just let me finish ironing this duvet cover and I'll be with you."

"Are you OK about telling your dad about Chris?" asked Sid.

"I'll be alright." said Jal, "I think he'll be relieved. He never did really take to Chris."

Jal finished ironing the duvet cover, folded it neatly and left it resting on the duvet. Cassie continued packing her rucksack as that was easier than collecting what she would need at Sid's house from scratch. Sid returned with Cassie to his home. On the way there, they dropped Jal off at her father's house. They arrived back at Sid's home. Liz welcomed Cassie with a great big warm sympathetic hug. She blushed.

"How are you feeling, Cassie?" said Liz, "I'm so sorry about Chris. It must have been horrible."

"It was." said Cassie, "I just felt his life just draining away."

Cassie broke down in tears. Sid held her.

"Sorry about that." said Cassie, recovering, "It just breaks me up when I recall it."

"Oh, Cassie, I'm so sorry." said Liz, "I shouldn't have made you cry. Anyway, have you eaten today?"

"I had breakfast with Sid in the flat." said Cassie, "Then all three of us went to a pub for lunch."

"Three of you?" asked Liz.

"Yes, Jal came at ten to see Chris." said Sid, "We spent the rest of the day dealing with the formalities. I thought it was best for Jal if she wasn't alone."

"You're becoming a really helpful, thoughtful, compassionate young man." said Liz, "Anyway, how was Mr Miles?"

"Very aggressive and intolerant," said Sid, "Until Jal told him very firmly what we'd been doing all day, and presented him with Chris's official death certificate. He was as nice as pie after that. He's invited us to the funeral."

"Are you going to go?" asked Liz.

"Of course." said Sid, "We have to say 'good-bye'."

"Before I got sidetracked," said Liz, "I was about to talk about dinner. Are either of you hungry?"

"Oddly, I'd like something." said Cassie.

"Well, you only had a jacket potato for lunch." said Sid, "We had mixed grills."

"I knew you were coming," said Liz, "But I didn't know when, so I've made some lamb stew. Is that OK?"

"That would be so lovely, Mrs Jenkins." said Cassie, beginning to smile at last.

Liz Jenkins served both Sid and Cassie with portions of her lamb stew. Cassie cautiously tasted it.

"This is delicious." said Cassie.

Sid was really pleased to see that Cassie was eating. It meant that, although she was still feeling very sad, she felt secure. He also knew that if she felt secure, she should recover from her emotional trauma relatively quickly. He was now becoming convinced that it was his open and heartfelt love for her that gave her this feeling of security. Once dinner was finished, Liz, Sid and Cassie went into the lounge and spent the evening discussing the events of the day including Mr Miles apparent change of attitude to the young people.

"At one point," said Sid, "He said that he almost felt ashamed of the way he had abandoned his son."

"Jal must be very persuasive." said Liz.

"She is." said Sid. "My Cassie was quite forthright on a couple of occasions as well."

"In the end," said Cassie, "He apologised for misjudging us. He then described us as three responsible serious minded young adults."

Conversation then turned to where Cassie would live now that Chris had died.

"I feel contented here," said Cassie, "But one thing is worrying me. With Chris gone, I will have to move out of his flat. I don't know where I am going to live."

"Cassie," said Liz, "You are welcome to live here. With dad gone, there is only Sid and myself rattling around in this big house."

"Are you sure?" asked Cassie.

"Of course." said Liz, "We don't want you to be out on the street. You can start moving your stuff from Chris's flat as soon as you like. Sid can use the estate car to reduce the number of journeys."

"Oh thank you so much, Mrs Jenkins." said Cassie, "You're so lovely. I think you're why Sid is such a sweet person."

"What a lovely thing to say about me." said Liz, shedding a little tear, "And not so much of the 'Mrs Jenkins'. You can call me Liz."

"I'll try to." said Cassie, smiling, "Anyway, thank you for the dinner. It was really lovely."

"Anyway, it's getting late." said Sid, yawning, "We've had a long emotionally charged day. We'd better be getting to bed. I've got my milk round in the morning."

Liz had prepared the spare room for Cassie. This evening, since Cassie was still emotionally fragile, she allowed Sid to sleep with her. She spent a second peaceful night cradled in Sid's gentle, compassionate arms.


	5. Chapter 5: Spreading the News

**Chapter 5: Spreading the News**

Very early the following morning, just before dawn, Sid gently woke Cassie up and reassured her that she wasn't in an empty house.

"Sweetness, I'm going on my milk round." said Sid, "You're in my house now, you're not on your own. You're safe, so you can sleep in peace. I'll be back at about half past eight."

He kissed her and let her go to sleep again. He quietly showered and went on his milk round. Cassie did go back to sleep and slept peacefully until Sid returned. Liz looked in on her at about seven o'clock, saw her sleeping peacefully and smiled. She knew that Cassie had another emotionally testing day ahead of her and needed as much peaceful rest as she could get. At about twenty five past eight, Sid returned and gently woke Cassie with a kiss and a cuddle.

"Good morning sweet Cass." said Sid, "How are you feeling this morning?"

"Still a little sad," said Cassie, "But I feel safe here."

"That's good." said Sid, "Are you ready for breakfast?"

"I suppose so," said Cassie, "What's the time?"

"About half past eight." said Sid,

"I slept well although this was a strange bed." said Cassie, "I vaguely remember you telling me you were going, but I thought it might have been a dream. I'm happy you're back. I love you."

"I love you too." said Sid, kissing Cassie's forehead.

Cassie stirred a little, stretched under the bedclothes and then eased herself gracefully out of the bed. Once she was standing, she embraced and kissed Sid, took her toilet bag from her rucksack and headed for the bathroom. Sid went downstairs to the kitchen, drawn there by the aroma of frying bacon.

"Good morning, Sid." said Liz, "Is Cassie moving?"

"Yes, she's in the bathroom." said Sid, "She'll be down soon."

"Good." said Liz, "I looked in on her while you were out. I must say she looks so peaceful when she sleeps, as if she hasn't got a care in the world."

"Yes," said Sid, "When I woke her up, she said she felt safe here."

"That's wonderful!" said Liz, "You must be doing her some good. I suppose you'll be telling the sad news to the rest of your friends. That'll make for another emotional day."

"Jal has offered to tell Michelle," said Sid, "so by the time she calls me back, most of them should know. We'll probably get together this evening."

"Good," said Liz, "That should reduce the emotional stress on Cassie. After what she's been through, she needs a bit of peace and a lot of love. I'm sure you can oblige."

Footsteps could be heard on the stairs. Cassie appeared wearing a plain white t-shirt, a knee length tartan skirt and a bright smile.

"Wow!" exclaimed Liz, "You're looking very fresh this morning. You're still sunny despite everything that's happened."

"Thanks to your generosity," said Cassie, "I've just had a really good sleep. I'm almost ready for anything."

"Are you ready for one of my mum's breakfasts?" asked Sid.

"I think so." said Cassie.

Sid and Cassie sat down to a traditional home cooked 'English' fried breakfast. It comprised bacon, eggs and some preboiled potatoes from the previous Sunday's lunch cut up and sautéed. For Sid, this was normal on a Thursday, but for Cassie it was a new experience. Since Sid used to have problems with bacon rinds, Liz had cut them off and fried them until they were crispy and brittle. After her initial surprise, Cassie seemed to really enjoy the meal. She particularly liked the crispy bacon rinds.

"This is so delicious." said Cassie, "Thank you so much, Mrs Jenkins. I won't need much for lunch today."

"As I said last night," said Liz, smiling, "Not so much of the 'Mrs Jenkins'. My name is Liz. I don't call you 'Miss Ainsworth'. You're Cassie. Anyway, I've got to go to work, so I'll see you two this evening."

"Thank you for letting me stay here." said Cassie, "Have a good day at work."

Thank you." said Liz, "Bye."

"Bye!" said Sid.

Liz set out for work. As she departed, Sid did the washing up, while Cassie went into the lounge and sat down. When he had finished, Sid joined her. He noticed that her head was down and she was wiping her eyes.

"What's the matter, sweetness?" asked Sid, gently, "You were so bright when you came down"

"It's just occurred to me." Said Cassie, tearfully, "He's gone forever. He'll never come back."

Sid put his arm across Cassie's slender shoulders and gently caressed her back, basically to let her know he was there for her. She responded by embracing him and bursting into tears. Sid, as before, gently held her until she began to calm down.

"Sorry about that." said Cassie, "I just had a little burst of sadness. Oh sweet Sid you're so good to me."

"That's why you need me to be with you as much as I can." said Sid, "You not only need love, but you need to know that you're loved."

"That's true." Said Cassie, recovering, "I suppose we'll have to think about what we're going to do today."

"Hopefully," said Sid, "Jal will by now have informed Michelle, which means that Tony will know soon enough. Then, she'll call me. I charged my mobile last night, so we don't have to stay here. Where would you like to go"

"Apart from that visit to Kingswood Park," said Cassie, "We spent all of yesterday in offices, houses, pubs and cars. I'd like some fresh air today. The breeze might blow some of my sadness away."

"I don't want to go too far out of Bristol," said Sid, "So let's explore Clifton Down."

"That would be lovely." said Cassie with the beginnings of a smile, "I'd better sort out my make-up."

"That's more like the Cassie I know." said Sid, "Once you're ready, we can start."

At half past ten, Sid and Cassie were standing in the middle of the Clifton Suspension bridge, holding each other and watching a couple of boats making their way up the river on the incoming tide. Sid's phone rang.

"Hello, Jal" said Sid, "Have you seen Michelle?"

"Yes." said Jal, "She was a bit stunned when I told her. Of course she's told Tony. He's suggested we all meet at lunchtime in Ronnie Fazer's bar."

"Has anyone invited Maxxie or Anwar?" asked Sid.

"Tony's left messages with them about the meeting," said Jal, "But he hasn't told them what it's about. Hopefully they'll show up. Incidentally, where are you?"

"I'm with Cassie on the Clifton Suspension Bridge," said Sid, "Getting some fresh air. Cassie needs it."

"That's good." said Jal, "Keep her mind off brooding. Anyway, we'll see you at Ronnie's at about one o'clock."

"That's a date." said Sid, "We'll both see you there. Bye!"

"Bye!" said Jal, "See you at Ronnie's."

"We're all meeting in Ronnie Fazer's bar at one." said Sid, "What do you want to do until then?"

"I've enjoyed our walk on the Down," said Cassie, "But I'd like to go somewhere really quiet with you."

"Such as?" asked Sid.

"There's a place Katie took me a couple of months ago when I came back from Scotland." said Cassie, "It's the Catholic Cathedral."

Is it open?" asked Sid.

"It should be." said Cassie, "It's not closed very often."

The couple made their way along Suspension Bridge Road. It wasn't very long before they could see the towers of this very modern church building. Twenty minutes later, they entered and selected two seats between the baptistry window and the altar. Cassie sat quietly contemplating. The effect the atmosphere of quiet contemplation in the building had on Sid even surprised him. He managed to sit still in a placid, meditative frame of mind for a full half hour. For most of this time, Cassie had adopted a kneeling position. It appeared to Sid that she was praying. After about thirty minutes, Cassie got up and suggested that they should have a snack before meeting the 'gang'. They briefly explored the cathedral before finding a bus stop.

"I really needed that period of quietness." said Cassie, "I had to accept what has happened or I'd keep on having these little breakdowns. I feel really calm now. It's a lovely feeling. Chris may have passed away, but he will always be alive in our hearts."

"That was quite a profound comment." said Sid, "I hope you can hold on to that frame of mind."

"I think I can," said Cassie, "At least as long as you're my closest companion."

"Well," said Sid, "I've no intention of ever leaving you. You mean too much to me. God only knows what I'd be without you."

"That is truer than you'll ever realise, dear Sid." said Cassie, "I've always known how you felt about me."

"How?" asked Sid,

"The way you look at me," said Cassie, "Your voice when you talk to me, the way you hold and caress me and the feeling I have in here when you're with me. I know I'm safe and secure when you're with me."

Sid embraced Cassie and kissed her. By this time, the couple had reached the road. Cassie consulted the timetable on the bus stop.

"This bus route is a bit strange." said Cassie, as she headed for a bus stop on the 'wrong' side of the road, "To go into town, you would expect to go over there, but this is the shorter way."

"Where does it go from over there, then?" asked Sid.

"It turns left twice and then goes right out to Redland before eventually turning back to the city centre. Ah, here's the bus."

Sid and Cassie boarded the bus, reaching the centre of Bristol at about half past eleven.


	6. Chapter 6: Discussions

**Chapter 6: Discussions**

They got out of the bus at the top of Park Street and walked slowly down towards College green. They looked into each Café and restaurant they passed. They reached a Chinese noodle bar. By this time, it was coming up to noon.

"How do you like Chinese?" asked Sid.

"I have tried it." said Cassie, "It's quite nice. OK, we'll go here. What were you thinking of having?"

"Well, you said that after that breakfast, you'd like a light lunch," said Sid, "So we could share a plate of noodles and possibly start with some prawn crackers. That way you can eat as much or as little as you like. Would you like them spicy?"

"Of course." said Cassie.

Sid and Cassie settled down to share a portion of prawn crackers and a portion of Singapore Vermicelli. Cassie ate about one third of each and Sid cleared the plate.

"One little problem," said Sid, "Michelle will be at the meeting. How do you feel about her?"

"That was the other thing I was thinking about in the Cathedral." said Cassie, "Tony's back with her, and I don't think those two can really live without each other. There's no point in keeping up my jealous attitude towards her. I will try to make up with her. After all, she used to be my best friend."

"That's a wonderful idea." said Sid, "Incidentally, other than me, who is your best friend now?"

"I suppose, since Chris has gone," said Cassie, "My closest friend is Katie, my clinic roommate. She's stayed by me and she's really kind, ever since I first met her two years ago. She consoled me and showed me a way forward when I came back from Scotland and found you were with Michelle."

"She must be a good person," said Sid, "I still feel guilty about betraying you."

"You needn't feel that way anymore." said Cassie, "I forgave you when you came to see me in Chris's flat, the time your anger at me dissolved in less than a minute."

After this light meal they headed for the venue for the meeting, arriving in Ronnie's bar at about ten to one. To their surprise, they saw Anwar and Maxxie sitting in a corner nursing drinks.

"Hello, you two are early." said Sid.

"We were quite close when Maxx got the text," said Anwar, "So we came straight here. You two are looking very serious. What's this all about?"

"Didn't Jal tell you?" asked Sid, "We'd better sit down. We are the bearers of tragic news."

"I'm not quite sure how to put this gently," said Cassie, quietly, "So I'll come straight out with it."

She paused, briefly.

"On Tuesday evening," said Cassie, solemnly, "Our dear friend, Chris passed away."

Anwar and Maxxie gasped. They looked at each other, stunned.

"He died while my sweet Cassie was holding him." said Sid, "Naturally, she's shattered."

"Oh, Cass, I'm so sorry." said Maxxie, lost for anything else to say.

Unusually for him, Anwar was totally lost for words.

"The reason for the meeting is obviously to let everyone know what's happened," said Cassie, "It's also to decide how we, as his friends are going to mark his passing."

Shortly after this, Jal, Tony and Michelle arrived. Jal went straight over to Ronnie Fazer to let him know why the seven young people were here. Tony and Michelle joined the other four at the table. Cassie appeared to be a bit edgy. Sid cuddled her. Michelle sensed why this was and made the first overture.

"Cassie," said Michelle, "I know we've had our differences, but both of us are now in secure relationships. I'm no threat to you. Sid needs you. He's vital to your happiness as well. Incidentally, why were you so brittle at the dinner the other night?"

"I know this might seem weird," said Cassie, "But I had a premonition that something really horrible was about to happen. I really felt unsociable that evening. I'm so sorry, Michelle. I spoiled everything didn't I."

"No, actually, you didn't." said Michelle, "You made us two think really seriously about our future and what we mean to each other. We're going to try to stay as a couple through uni. I hope it works out better than your long distance relationship."

"That broke down through an unfortunate misunderstanding." said Cassie.

At this point, Ronnie Fazer came across to the friends with Jal.

"I'm sorry to hear about your loss." said Ronnie, "I know I've said one or two negative things about Chris in the past, but he was a human being. He died far too young. I suppose you lot have gathered here to decide how to mark his passing."

"That is the general idea." said Jal as she sat down, "I've had a few thoughts on the subject, but I'll be discussing them with my close friends first."

At this point, Tony intervened.

"Chris was our friend." stated Tony, "While it's tragic that he's dead, I feel that we should celebrate the positive qualities he possessed. He was always the life and soul of any party. I've rarely seen him depressed. So, whatever we do to mark his passing, it should be to celebrate his all too short life. Any ideas?"

"I don't want to put too much of a wet blanket on your ideas," said Jal, "But Cassie here is still very upset. She was holding him when he died and it's still less than forty eight hours. Maxxie and Anwar have only just heard the news within the last ten minutes, so let's have a moment of reflection."

"Well spoken, Jal," said Michelle, "We do need to mourn his passing. Anwar looks absolutely shattered by the news."

"How did it happen?" asked Anwar, "I knew he was ill, but I didn't think it was that serious. You really mean he's gone?"

"He was born with a fault in the blood vessels in his brain." said Jal, "It meant that one of them could burst almost without warning at any time. His elder brother died of the same condition when he was still a boy. On Tuesday night, it burst, killing him. I don't suppose the recreational drugs he was taking helped, but it is something which would have happened sooner or later anyway."

"You must be shattered." said Anwar.

"I suppose I've been preparing myself," said Jal, "But it's still a shock. Yesterday wasn't so bad. Dashing around registering the event kept our minds occupied."

"That's true," said Sid, "I'm trying to keep my mind away from it as much as possible, but I suppose I will come to realise that he's really gone."

"I guess I've known about this for over a year." said Jal, "Do you remember that day when Chris walked to college naked?"

"That was hard to forget." said Cassie, "That was when Maxxie persuaded George to give up his trousers after Michelle failed."

"Well," said Jal, "Once we'd got him some clothes, We went to his father's house. We received a rather dusty reception from Graham Miles. After that, he ran off to the cemetery where his brother was buried. He explained how his brother died and told me he had the same condition and could die suddenly at any time."

"And you've been living with that hanging over you for all that time?" commented Cassie.

"I suppose I have." Said Jal, "I've been hoping against hope that it might not happen. He wasn't exactly keeping a secret from me. I knew about it all the time."

"You're braver than me." said Michelle, "I'd have been worried sick about him every day."

"I suppose it was his way of living as if every day was going to be his last that kept me from thinking about it." said Jal, "I knew it was almost certain to happen, but I didn't know when."

"You don't make life easy for yourself, do you." said Maxxie, "I'd have broken down under that kind of stress."

"Anyway," continued Jal, "After we three had registered poor Chris's death, we went to see his father. Once we'd 'tamed' him, he was really sweet. He's invited us three, that is Sid, Cassie and myself, to the funeral. He's going to let me know when it happens. The point is that I'm sure you four would like to attend."

"Of course we would, but how do you suppose that's going to happen?" asked Tony, "from what you've told me, he's a somewhat awkward character."

"Once he tells me when it's going to happen," said Jal, "I guess it falls to me to sweet talk him into accepting you four."

"I'll help if you like." said Michelle, "I'm your best friend after all."

"Thank you." said Jal, "I'll let you know when I hear from Graham Miles."

"I might be of assistance." said Cassie, "He did say some really nice things about me, once he'd calmed down."

"Yes, I think us three should be able to talk him round." said Jal.

"Anyway, Tony," said Michelle, "You were about to invite suggestions regarding Chris's funeral. Obviously,we'll have to co-ordinate our arrangements with the formal burial service. Jal, have you any thoughts?"

"I'm just beginning to think of something I would like to say." said Jal, "It will be a sort of eulogy. I don't want to say much more at present, because I'd like it to be a surprise. I'd like to read it in the church if possible, so that all the mourners would know how we loved and respected Chris."

"I'm only guessing at the moment," said Tony, "But it's quite likely that the funeral will be very close to 'exam results' day. You all know what we've planned for that. It would be serendipitous if it occurred on the same day."

"What have we planned?" asked Anwar.

"You do know what's going to happen." said Maxxie, "After some fairly large fireworks, we read each other's results out round a bonfire. Tony told you about this last week."

The friends continued to discuss what would happen during and after the funeral for some time, but agreed that nothing could really be decided until Graham Miles had contacted Jal.


	7. Chapter 7: Waiting

**Chapter 7: Waiting**

A couple of days after the inconclusive meeting in Ronnie Fazer's bar, Jal received a phone call from Graham Miles. He informed Jal that the funeral would be on the same Thursday as the publication of the exam results.

"Would this date be convenient?" asked Graham, "It will be late in the afternoon."

"As a Matter of fact," said Jal, "That would be perfect. Some of his other friends were planning a sort of celebration of his short life for the early evening."

"How many other friends?" asked Graham.

"Only four." said Jal, "There's Cassie's close friend, Michelle and her long time boyfriend, Tony, together with their friends, Maxxie and Anwar."

"If they are as serious about their lives as you three seem too be," said Graham, "I might consider inviting them as well."

"Seeing that the day of Chris's funeral is exam results day," said Jal, "I think all of us will be in quite a serious mood. We're thinking about not opening our results until after the observances. Anyway, thank you for considering them."

"I'd like to meet them." said Graham, "Do you think you could arrange that."

"Certainly!" said Jal, "I'll try to sort out a date when all seven of us can be together. That shouldn't be too difficult just after the end of term. I'll ring round and see what I can do."

"I'm free on the next two evenings, that is tomorrow and Friday." said Graham, "We could meet either at my house or anywhere convenient to you."

"I think it might be a bit crowded in your lounge." said Jal, "My dad runs a jazz bar in town. It's usually quiet in the early evening. We could meet there."

"You must be Jalander Fazer." said Graham, sounding surprised, "Weren't you last year's Young Musician woodwind finalist?"

"Yes, I was." said Jal, "I didn't win, but if my exam results are good, I am going to a music college in London in September."

"Good for you!" said Graham, "Good luck with your results. Anyway, I think it would be a good idea to meet at your father's bar. Call your friends and see which evening they can all go there."

"Thanks, I'll do that." said Jal, "As soon as I've contacted them, I'll call you back, and thank you again for accepting us."

"And thank you for being so helpful." said Graham, "Hope to hear from you soon. Incidentally, what did you play for your college audition?"

"The Weber concertino." said Jal.

"Lovely piece." said Graham, "It's nine minutes of sheer delight. I'm sure you impressed the panel. Anyway, bye for now. I'll see you tomorrow or Friday evening."

After Jal rang off, she passed a message round the other six friends to ascertain which evening would be best. The replies came back. It was unanimous that the Thursday would be more convenient. In any case Anwar was tied up with family and religious matters on Friday and Maxxie had a dance rehearsal in London. Jal called Graham Miles back to inform him that Thursday would be the better evening. She also told her father to be prepared for a small informal gathering the next evening. She also suggested that Ace, Lynton and their friend be kept well away. Ronnie Fazer said he would arrange that.

All the friends could do now was wait. The one person who found this hardest, for obvious reasons, was Jal. She had spent the days immediately after Chris's death in intense activity in an attempt to keep the tragic event out of her mind. Sid and Cassie had an easier time as they were involved in moving Cassie's bits and pieces from Chris's flat to the spare bedroom in Sid's home. They were also kept cheerful by Sid's mum, Liz, who helped Cassie unpack and put everything in cupboards and drawers. Sid's frequent loving reassurances served to keep Cassie from brooding too much over Chris's death.

The survivors of the 'gang' gathered at seven o'clock on Thursday evening with some trepidation, as they knew Graham Miles's reputation for being less than tolerant of young people. Ronnie Fazer assured Jal that Ace and Lynton had gone to perform at a rap club the other side of the city.

"Good evening." said Graham as he arrived, "I think introductions are in order. I'm Graham Miles, Chris's father."

"You already know Sid and Cassie." said Jal, "This is Tony and his girlfriend Michelle. The blonde one at the end of the table is Maxxie. He's a dancer. The last one is Maxxie's friend, Anwar."

Each of the group stood up and shook hands with Mr. Miles as they were introduced.

"I know only three of you have met me." said Graham, sitting down, "My name is Graham Miles. I'm Chris's father. I've come here this evening to discuss my son's funeral arrangements. I did have it in mind to exclude all of you from the ceremony, but having met Sid, Cassie and Jal, my opinion of you lot has changed. I was previously under the impression that Chris's friends were a collection of drug addicted, time wasting layabouts. You three, Jal, Sid and Cassie have disabused me of that impression. You spent the whole of the day after he died going through all the formalities of registering his death, saving me a lot of time and inconvenience. It is clear that you all loved and respected Chris, and stood by him even after death. My first impression of the rest of you is favourable. I'm sure you would like to say goodbye to your friend. You are all welcome to the funeral provided you dress appropriately."

"Thank you Mr. Miles." said Tony, "I can assure you we will behave. We will probably leave the wake early as we will be celebrating his life as well as mourning his death in the evening."

"You're Tony, aren't you?" said Graham, "What are your thoughts about your future?"

"If my exam results are OK," said Tony, "I'm going to Cardiff University. After that I hope to find a job that suits my qualifications. My girlfriend, Michelle will do the same. Unfortunately she's going to York. We really hope we can stay in touch with each other."

"And you, Maxxie?" asked Graham.

"I'm a dancer, a good one." said Maxxie, "I'm got an audition arranged for a role in a London show."

"You all seem to be a group of serious minded young people." said Graham, "I'm impressed. Recently, I have felt intimidated when confronted with a group of teenagers, but you lot have made me both welcome and comfortable. Thank you."

At this point, Graham Miles surprised everyone by offering to buy a round of drinks. Once these had been distributed, the friends discussed the arrangements for the actual funeral service and the burial. Jal asked if she could read a eulogy at the service. Graham said she could. The friends then outlined what they intended to do afterwards.

"That's impressive," said Graham, "But I think I'll host the formal wake. I'm getting a bit old for that kind of thing."

"The fireworks and bonfire are also our way of either celebrating or commiserating our exam results." Said Tony. "The 'celebration' was arranged some time before Chris died, as we all knew when we would know our results. What happened to Chris, obviously casts a shadow over the day, but, as Jal mentioned earlier, after mourning his death at the funeral service, we feel we should celebrate his short life in our own way. He knew his time on earth was limited, so he didn't take life too seriously. He lived from day to day, enjoying his life as much as possible. He was always the life and soul of any party. He even got our ultra studious friend Jal here, to live her life as if joy was a permitted emotion. He was always there with a cheerful word if anyone was feeling down. He just wanted everyone around him to be happy."

Jal smiled.

"Wow!" exclaimed Graham, "That was something of a eulogy in itself. I'll be interested to hear what Jal has to say at the funeral."

"I've had some thoughts about what I'm going to say," said Jal, "But I'd like it to be a surprise. Sufficient to say, it will be based around one of Chris's particular heroes. Don't worry Mr Miles, it will be dignified but passionate."

"I'm even more interested now." said Graham, "I think you've given me something to look forward to. Anyway, it's time for me to go. I'll expect you all to be sitting in the church at three next Thursday. I'm sorry I was so short with you last week. I just let my preconceptions about you lot run away with me."

"That's OK," said Cassie, "You weren't to know what we were really like. I hope we've convinced you that we are human."

"You've done more than that." said Graham, "I see in front of me seven young adults who are taking life seriously and are thinking about their future. I wish you all well. I'll see you at the funeral."

With this, Mr Miles got up and left. The seven friends continued to plan how to fit the formal funeral arrangements in with their proposed celebrations. Tony asked Jal about her 'eulogy' and who the hero was.

"I said it was going to be a surprise." said Jal, "That applies to you as well. As I said it'll be built round one of the people Chris admired. You'll hear all about him at the funeral."

"You're being very mysterious." said Maxxie.

"I know I am," said Jal, "But I think it'll be worth the wait."

"Well," said Tony, "He wasn't such an ogre after all."

"That's probably because we gave him something of a pleasant surprise last week." said Jal.

"Anyway," said Tony, "I think we know how things are going. Let's drink to Chris's memory."

With this, the glasses were refilled and the friends proposed a toast to the memory of their recently deceased friend. They spent the rest of the evening quietly discussing the funeral and their forthcoming exam results.


	8. Chapter 8: Goodbye Chris, Hello Results

**A/N: Since 2008 when this story was set, Felix Baumgartner has bettered Joe Kittinger's record. On 14 October 2014, he jumped from an altitude of 39 km, reaching supersonic speed in free fall.**

 **Chapter 8: Goodbye Chris, Hello Results**

Now that the funeral arrangements had been made, there was little the friends could do but wait. Cassie still needed frequent morale boosting reassurances from both Sid and Katie as she was still in a somewhat emotionally fragile state. Jal was holding up fairly well as she had her family to support her. Whatever may be said about Dale and Lynton Fazer, they were real brothers to Jal.

On the morning of the funeral, the friends gathered at Chris's flat. Jal contacted Mr. Miles and ascertained that James, Maxxie's new boyfriend and Kenneth could attend. Graham Miles said they could.

In an attempt to take Jal's mind off the forthcoming events, Michelle invited her to spend the night before the funeral at her house. In the morning, Jal was feeling depressed and was somewhat reluctant to get out of bed. The two girls curled up inside a duvet cover for a while and recalled he times when they did this as children. Later on, Michelle took Jal to Clifton Zoo, ostensibly to take her mind off the funeral. While they were walking round the zoo, Jal wondered why they were there, she hated zoos. Michelle told Jal the real reason she had come to the zoo. After a bit of discussion, they went to the aquarium where they spent a considerable amount of time recollecting and discussing Chris's attitude to life. The aquarium at Clifton Zoo was where Michelle first met Chris when he was a little boy. She recalled him apparently talking to the fish. This helped Jal to see the positive side of the day. Michelle also made another attempt at getting Jal to open up about her eulogy, but failed.

During the course of the day, the other friends gradually assembled at Chris's flat as it was quite near to the church where the funeral service was to take place. First to arrive were Sid and Cassie. Cassie was still feeling emotionally fragile, so needed Sid to be constantly by her side through the day. She felt safe when he was with her. The feeling was reciprocal as Sid felt really contented when he was with Cassie. Maxxie and his partner, James were next, followed shortly afterwards by Tony and Anwar. Shortly after one o'clock, Michelle and Jal arrived fresh from their visit to the zoo. Last to arrive was Kenneth, who had experienced some difficulty finding the flat.

"Good afternoon, Kenneth?" said Tony, "What kept you?"

"I got lost." said Kenneth "This place is quite hard to find."

"There's still about an hour before we have to set out." said Sid, "I suggest we all have a coffee."

"Why not something stronger?" suggested Tony, "It's going to be a serious afternoon."

"That's why Sid suggested coffee." said Michelle, "Mr Miles is quite an awkward customer. We should go to the service completely sober. Anything stronger can wait till afterwards."

"Point taken." said Tony.

Sid made six cups of coffee and three hot chocolates as Cassie, Jal and James preferred the sweeter drink. Once the drinks were finished, the friends set out for the church.

"Are you OK?" asked Sid as he noticed that Cassie was wiping her eyes.

"I'm feeling just a little sad." said Cassie, "We're actually going to say our final 'goodbye' to our friend. Anyway, it is OK to cry at a funeral."

"S'pose." said Sid.

The friends walked together to the church, talking quietly amongst themselves. Sid held Cassie's hand to reassure her. She really needed him at this point. Tony tried to keep Michelle's mind off the funeral by discussing how they might stay in touch when they were at separate universities. Despite his worries about his results, Anwar tried to keep Jal from crying by being his usual light hearted self, although he realised that he would have to maintain a solemn disposition at the service itself.

"Well, here we are." said Tony, as they arrived at the church, "Jal, are you OK?"

"I'm as OK as I can be," said Jal, "You won't have to wait much longer."

Graham Miles greeted the friends at the church door and ushered them to their pews. He sat Jal at the aisle end of a pew as she would be giving a short eulogy during the service.

Once everyone was in place, the funeral service went ahead. As Chris's mother was Catholic, the service in church took the form of a Requiem mass. Eventually, it was time for the recollections of Chris's life. Graham Miles spoke about Chris and his brother as children. Tony continued the story, outlining Chris's attitude to his short life, and his uncanny ability to raise the morale of his group of friends no matter how gloomy the outlook seemed to be. After Tony had spoken, it was Jal's turn. Graham Miles introduced her.

"You've heard about the highlights of Chris's short life." Said Graham, "Let me introduce Jalander Fazer, his girlfriend. I believe she has something unusual to say about Chris."

She stepped forward and took her place at the lectern. She started speaking.

"Thank you." said Jal, "These guys know all about Chris, so I determined to tell all of you about someone different. I thought I'd say something about a hero of Chris's. A man called Captain Joe Kittinger."

She paused.

"In 1960, climbing into a foil balloon," continued Jal, "Captain Joe ascended 32 kilometres into the stratosphere. And then, armed only with a parachute, he jumped out. He fell for four minutes, reaching 740mph before opening his parachute five kilometres above the earth. It had never been done before, and has never been done since."

Jal paused again. It was obvious that she was near to tears.

Graham Miles was beginning to wonder where this 'eulogy' was going.

"He did it just because he could - and that's why Chris loved him." continued Jal, composing herself, "Because the thing about Chris was he said yes. He said yes to everything. He loved everyone. - He was the bravest boy - man, I knew. And that was why he flung himself out of a foil balloon every day. Because he could. Because he was. And that's why - and that's why we - we loved him. - Thank you."

Michelle helped a tearful Jal back to her pew and comforted her. All the mourners, including Graham Miles stood up and applauded this heartfelt and emotional speech.

The requiem mass concluded and the mourners made their way from the church to the graveyard where Chris was to be buried next to his brother.

"Well done Jalander." said Graham after the interment, "I could tell that eulogy came from your heart. It injected a positive note into a solemn occasion. It also underlined how much all you young people loved my son. Thank you so much for speaking out."

"Thank you." Said Jal, "I felt I had to emphasize Chris's courage in living and staying cheerful in the face of the constant threat of death."

"You certainly did that." said Graham, "I now realise that excluding you and your friends would have been a big mistake. You've all behaved impeccably."

The friends stayed at the wake for about three quarters of an hour before making their excuses and leaving for their own observance of Chris's death and their exam results.

They went to the field behind the graveyard and enjoyed a very noisy five minute firework display! before gathering round a small bonfire and preparing to find out how they had done in their 'A' levels.

"Jal, you all right?" asked Michelle.

"Yeah, I'm fine." said Jal.

"Results o'clock, I think." said Tony.

"Chris would want us to have a party," said Anwar, "A proper blow-out before you all leave."

"But I'm leaving tonight." said Maxxie.

"Tonight?" asked Tony.

"Yes." Said Maxxie, "Me and James are on the late coach to London. I've got my dance audition tomorrow afternoon."

"There you go." said Sid

"We're all busy." said Tony, "Maybe at Christmas when we come back, yeah? - Right, then."

Sid reached into the bag containing the results and pulled out an envelope.

"No peeking." said Tony

"Tony." Announced Sid, "Three A's and a B. - Cardiff it is then."

There was a pause.

"Yeah, and if anyone gets me a Baa Baa Fuck Sheep," said Tony, "I'll kill them."

"So, who's next?" said Maxxie, reaching into the bag, "Sidney. - B, C, C."

"Yay, Sidney boy!" said Anwar."

"Good job." said Tony.

"Maxxie." Said Michelle as she opened Maxxie's results.

"Maxxie." Repeated Sid.

"B, E." announced Michelle.

"B, E." repeated Maxxie, "Be. Not bad. "I be, I be. Nice one."

"Chuck us the bag, Chelle." said Sid, "Jalander."

Jal showed signs of nerves.

"It'll be fine, Jal." Said Michelle.

"Two A's and a C." said Sid.

"Great stuff!" Said several people.

"Well done, Jal!" said Sid.

"Now give it here." Said Tony

"Well done, Jal!" Echoed Michelle.

Tony opened Michelle's envelope.

"Michelle," announced Tony, "B, A, A. Well done!"

"Looks like you're off to York." said Sid.

"Well played, Chelle." Said Maxxie.

Sid reached into the bag and produced another envelope.

"Cassie," said Sid, opening Cassie's results, "Two C's and a B. Same as me. Well done."

"It does mean I'll have to retake my last year if I'm going to Uni." Said Cassie, "Sid, would you like to do the same? Then we can both apply and we can go to uni together if things go well."

"I'd really love that." said Sid, "We'll be able to stay together as a couple."

"You two do need some stability." said Michelle, "And it's plainly obvious you are deeply in love with each other."

"Thanks!" said Sid.

Cassie smiled and embraced Sid, kissing him.

"You two are already a couple anyway." said Michelle, "Cassie needs your love, Sid. Don't ever let her down."

"I won't." said Sid.

"Hang on, still one left." said Maxxie, "Anwar."

"Where's he gone?" said Sid, "He was there a minute ago."

"They've been opened." said Maxxie,

"He'll be fine." Said Sid, "He worked really hard."

"Two Es and a U." said Maxxie, "How fine is that?"

"No wonder he slipped away." said Tony, "He didn't want the embarrassment."

"He'll manage, somehow." said Sid, "He's got his family to support him. He'll probably work with his dad on the cabs."

After their 'results' meeting, the friends, with the exception of Maxxie and James, returned to Ronnie Fazer's bar and spent the rest of the evening drinking and discussing their future plans and their prospects.


	9. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

Now that, with the exception of Sid and Cassie, the friends had finished their secondary education, they had to think seriously about their careers.

Maxxie's audition was successful and he obtained a position in the dance troupe of a long running West End musical show.

Anwar went up to London with Maxxie and James, but only stayed a couple of weeks before returning to Bristol and his family. In view of his disappointing exam results, he opted to join his father in the taxi business and retake his 'A' levels part time. Encouraged by his sisters, he formed a relationship with Seeta which had the approval of both families. After a couple of years, they became engaged. Soon after, they married.

Meanwhile, Tony and Michelle had to decide how they were going to proceed with their long-term relationship. These thoughts had been prompted by Cassie's slightly cutting remarks at the dinner on the eve of Chris's death. They both realised they wanted to continue their relationship, but were not ready to live away from each other just yet. They opted to take a 'gap' year. Nine months of it were spent working and earning money, while the remaining quarter was spent travelling together in the Far East. After this, they felt ready to go to their respective universities and live several hundred miles apart while keeping in touch with each other. By this time, they believed that their relationship had become secure enough to withstand a period of separation. They became engaged during their second year on the weekend of the Royal wedding.

After her somewhat spectacular audition, Jal went to her music college and studied clarinet and composition. She graduated and eventually found a post in the woodwind section of the BBC National Orchestra of Wales, based in Cardiff.

After discussing their situation with Liz, Sid and Cassie applied to Roundview College and were allowed to retake their A2 year. They also applied to several universities, obtaining provisional places on the same course at Oxford Brookes and York. They decided, provided their results were suitable, to go to York as they would have a friend there. Cassie resumed her close friendship with Michelle and let bygones be bygones. After all, Cassie's relationship with Sid was now so secure that very little could break it. At the end of their retake, their results were much better. They both attained two 'A's and a 'B'. When they were at York University, Sid and Cassie were able to boost Michelle's morale when she felt Tony was neglecting her. Because of Tony and Michelle's gap year, Sid and Cassie were at university at the same time. They also became engaged to be married on the Royal wedding weekend. So, two couples, who had been friends for over a decade hosted a double engagement party in Bristol for all their friends and all four families.


End file.
